Sunday, June 11, 2006

Cool Points

What you see as....



I may see as a different kind of more socially accepted nerd...



Get it? Yeah, I'm one too.


Cool. Rad. Awesome. Fab. Far out. Wicked. Sweet. Dare I even mention the terribly 80s surfer favorite, 'tubular'.

We all have different ways of describing something we are pleased with. And a lot of what one person may be pleased with may seem completely dorky, nerdy, or uncool to another person.

For example, I think someone who is a fan of Prince's music is cool.

And yes, I'm aware that may make me uncool in some of your eyes. I am prepared to deal with that. Sort of. Don't mock me too hard. I'm fragile...

So, why am I musing on the variations of coolness in life? Well, because I am about to do something pretty uncool and try and explain something which I don't even quite understand. Cool points.

What are cool points you ask? How does one earn cool points? Why the hell should I care about cool points? Why am I reading this damn blog anyhow?? Peace, I'm out.



Are they gone?
Ok, now that we got rid of the 'uncool' riff raff, let's get down to business.

'Cool Points' is an extremely loosely defined concept, semi-jokingly defining how much in common I have with individuals. I award cool points when I find something that we have in common. The dorkier, the better, the more cool points awarded. You could have the most cool points ever as one of my friends, but chances are, you are shunned by most of the outside world. So, it may be best for you to not have an abundance of cool points if you wish to still be accepted as normal by the general public.

Speaking of being accepted by the normal public, I know I'm not. That is why I have absolutely no qualms sharing all these dorky things I am a fan of. Honestly I have never actually assigned a numerical point value to any of these things, but they are things I have, in the past, officially awarded cool points for. C'mon, I'm not that big of a nerd. Oh wait, I'm assigning point values now...

Consider yourself a nerd and are deemed to be so by me : 5-10 cool points
We gotta encourage each others nerd-dom. It's the only way we'll survive. No love is as beautiful as nerd-love.

Likes to Argue/Debate intelligently, with random bouts of being comically irrational : 10-15 cool points
It's one thing to like to argue and do it well, that will get you some cool points, but what fun is it if you can't throw someone off every now and again with a completely irrational retort like, 'Oh yeah, well, you smell like a week old tortoise.'

Being a fan of Prince's music : Old stuff (50-100 points), Old & New (150 points)
Who doesn't love Raspberry Beret, Kiss, Seven, Call My Name, Most Beautiful Girl in the World, Pussy Control, Little Red Corvette, Musicology, Cream, Purple Rain, Black Sweat? Only me? Oh, ok, just good to know one can still be unique.

Fan of Cowboy Mouth : varies from 100-2,000 cool points
Just a passing fan, ok that's cool too. Able to sing almost every song they have written and performed live? You sir or madam, are a god or goddess.

Member of the band Cowboy Mouth : Infinity
Sorry, of course this is only open to Fred, Paul, JTG, Rob, Mary, or Sonia.

Have a large vocabulary and know such words as perspicacious, triskadecaphobia, etc:
25-50 cool points
I like big words, especially when I drink. It's not that I'm snobby about it. It's like two people who know a foreign language and like to speak it to each other so other's can't follow along.

Have a large movie quote vocabulary and know things like, 'Jimmy Dolen shake and bake', 'Wolfmen don't got nards', and 'God I love my job.':
2 pts for each movie quote we both know and use
Remember that bit about speaking a different language earlier? yeah, that applies here as well. I have been known to carry entire conversations using only movie quotes.

These are some of the things I have awarded cool points for in the past. That's not to say there aren't other ways to earn them. I also don't always notify people when they receive cool points, so don't be offended if you don't have a score sheet started with me. So to recap, asking to earn cool points is an automatic deduction of cool points. If you ask to discuss cool points and then comically throwing me off the topic somewhere in the conversation by saying, 'I think that the answer to global warming is to just flip over and warm the other side', you are my people.

Tell me there aren't things that you might find in common with someone that doesn't just automatically make them one of your new best friends. That's what this is, just quantified. To quote Calvin, 'If your numbers go up, It means you're having more fun!'

Oh yeah, Calvin and Hobbes fan? Add 30 points...

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Huh...well that sure did explain a lot. Makes me sad I'm lacking b/c all that is such cool stuff. =[