Calvin & Hobbes (A,H,&P IV and V))

Weirdos From Another Planet

- Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.
- Physical education is what you learn from having your face in someone's armpit right before lunch.
- I've got to start listening to those quiet, naggin doubts.
- Life's a lot more fun when you're not repsonsible for your actions.
- You know, sometimes it seems things go by too quickly. We're so busy watching out for what's just ahead of us that we don't take the time to enjoy where we are. Days go by and we hardly notice them. Life becomes a blur. Often it takes some calamity to makes us live in the present. Then suddenly we wake up and see all the mistakes we've made, but it;s too late to change anything.
- At times like these, all mom can think of is how long she was in labor with me.
- We're just tiny specs on a planet hurling thorugh the infinte blacknes...let's go in and turn on all the lights.
- As if life isn't short enough.
- You can't be cool if you don't have an attitude. Hmm, we could be courteously deferential.
- Why can't I ever build character at a Miami condo or a casino somewhere?
- Ever notice how tense gronw-ups get when they're recreating?
- Sometimes one should just look at things and think about things, without doing things.
- The female gender would be a lot more tolerable if it wasn't so darn cynical.
- That's one of the remarkable things about life. It's never so bad that it can't get worse.
- Being a parent is wanting to hug and strangle your kid at the same time.
- There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.
- Acid rain, toxic wastes, holes in the ozone, sewage in the oceans...the only bright side to all this is that eventually there may not be a piece of the planet worth fighting over.
- I don't see how anyone could ever fall in love. People are jerks. ...(hobbes)... Sometimes they are, but look at all the colors on the trees toady. I think it's more fun to see something like this WITH someone then just by yourself...(calvin)...I guesssss so.
- I go to school, but I never learn what I want to know.
- Moms would be a lot more fun if tehy were a little more gullible.
- I feel a big sneeze welling up, which is always a sure sign that I'm not carrying a handkerchief.
- I keep forgetting that rules are only for little nice people.
- It must be awful to be a girl. I'm sure it's frustrating knowing that men are bigger, stronger, and better at abstract thought than women...(susie)...The thought of a jerk like you begging one of us for a date when you're 17.
- Do you think God let's you plea bargain?

Revenge of the Baby-Sat

- Mothers are the necessity of invention.
- Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery.
- I find my life is a lot easier the lower I keep everyone's expectations.
- The best presents don't come in boxes...(they hug)...I'll treasure this one forever.
- There's nothing prettier than new fallen snow on a clear, freezing moonlit night...through a window that is.
- I suppose it's best to hold fast when you can and compromise when you need to...(calvin)...That's a lot more mature than I think I care to be.
- There's something magical about having a fire. The crackles and snaps, the warm, flickering light...everything always seems safe and cozy if you're sitting in front of a fire.
- I like these cold, gray winter days. Days like this let you savor a bad mood.
- Childhood is short and maturity is forever.
- I can't think of anything I'd rather anticipate than have right away. Can you?...(hobbes)... Death comes to mind.
- The longer you wait for the mail, the less there is in it.
- When you are serious about having fun, it's not much fun at all.
- Nothing helps a bad mood like spreading it around.
- My likely historical significance is a terrible burden.
- I think most hiccup cures were really invented for the amusement of the patient's friends.
- This is one of those things you always figure will happen to someone else...(mom)...unfortunately, we're all 'someone else' to someone else.
- A man's home is his castle, but it shouldn't have to be his fortress.
- I don't think I'd have been in such a hurry to reach adulthood if I'd known it was all going to be ad-libbed.
- I think nighttime is dark so you can imagine your fears with less distraction.
- Things are never quite as scary when you have a best friend.
- People pay more attention to you when they think you're up to something.
- Mom wouldn't care about these types of things is she owuldn't keep finding out about them.
- I wish my bathtub had an agitator.
- Some women just weren't meant to be mothers.
- In my book food should be nutrition and entertainment.
- People think it must be fun to be a super-genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world.
- We supre-powers have it tough.
- How can kids know so much and still be so dumb.
- It's only work if somebody makes you do it.
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